Absence

Absence :

 “Absence and death are the same - only that in death there is no suffering.” - Theodore Roosevelt

“Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like hell."  - Millay, Edna St. Vincent on absence

Loss may take away everything we may have. But it leaves behind one thing for sure – Absence. Nothing makes us loose our focus more than the moment when we miss someone or something. The emotion is so intense that it transports us to a different time & different space, leaving us in a new emotion all together. It is capable of bringing smiles on teary eyes, and tears on a joyful occasion.

The absence of someone is very different from the feeling of loss. While loss is associated with what we do not have anymore, absence is whom we do not have anymore. We can grieve for loss of love, loss of a relationship, but never for a person. It is the absence of the person that punches a blow into us leaving us flabbergasted at times or completely broken till we regain composure.

Ever seen a child walking into an empty home and realizing that his grandparents are no more in the same space or a single person sitting in a coffee shop smilingly reading a book and then a tear rolling down from one eye. That is the moment when the person has realized the absence of the things, of the person that once was. He or she may not necessarily be sad, it’s just that the person realizes the absence of other person, and badly wishes to turn back the hands of time.

While loss is a pinching pain, absence leaves with a sweet twinge in heart. When you miss someone, and if someone around you asks, you cannot even mention the feeling. All you do is look up, fake a smile and simply say “Nothing “.

Losses in relationships are most of times compensated with a new similar relationship but the absence of a person is never compensated. As a child you may go hungry without lunch just because you have had your lunch always with your dad, and he is out of town for day or two. You can never even think of replacing the person with someone or something else. And even if you try you cannot.

The feeling of loss eventually fades away, it has to, else it will make the breaths fade away. But you can live the rest of your life with the absence of person who was more of a part of you than you yourself. After all love doesn’t just teach you to live with presence of someone, it also gives you the strength to live with absence of the person you so strongly feel for.

“Absence doth sharpen love, presence strengthens it; the one brings fuel, the other blows it till it burns clear.” -  William Shakespeare